Stillborn Memorial Service and Funeral Ideas

Losing a baby causes a significant amount of long-lasting grief, and planning a funeral or memorial is one of the most traumatic things a parent will experience. But for some parents, this can help process their grief and create a special moment to say goodbye. There's no right or wrong way to honor your little one, but the below list may give you some ideas of ways to memorialize your baby and plan a special funeral or service.

Stillborn Memorial Ideas

A memorial service takes place after the cremation or burial. It can be held anywhere and any amount of time after the passing. Some memorial ideas to consider:

• Make a donation to a charity in your baby’s honor. Friends and family can also donate to a charity that funds research into stillbirth prevention.
• Create a website or blog where you share your feelings and write about your little one. Others can also contribute writings.
• Do a memorial release where you release doves, butterflies, balloons, or sky lanterns, fly kites, or release small paper boats onto a lake.
• Plant a memorial tree or garden. Many parents find comfort and peace, because they can care for and grow it each year. Messages and wishes can be written on seed paper and planted in the garden. The garden can be adorned with a memory stone or other symbols that remind you of your baby.
• Paint stones with your baby’s name, initials, or any other symbolic picture and leave them around the neighborhood, in a park, or on a hiking trail.
• Scatter your baby’s ashes in a special place. You can turn this into a small service with close friends and family.

Stillborn Funeral Ideas

A funeral service is where the casket is present, and it occurs before cremation or burial. In most cases, the funeral takes place one to two weeks after the baby’s birth. There are many unique and special ways to organize a funeral that honors your baby:

• Decide on a guestlist and venue. There are different purposes of funeral services, and choosing the one that suits you and your family the most is a very personal choice.
• There are some important considerations when visiting a funeral home, such as the casket. Many parents choose a white casket to signify the purity of their baby and then ask friends and family to write messages on it.
• Think about what music you want to play. Music is a very comforting part of a funeral service and allows you to express feelings for which words alone are inadequate.
• Choose special readings or poems. These may help to express emotions and feelings.
• Think about if there are any other aspects you would like to include. For example, do you want flowers for the funeral? Would you like people to wear bright colors? Do you want a photographer to take photos of the ceremony as a keepsake later on? Would you like to include letters from siblings and other family members in the casket?
• Tell people what to take to the funeral service and lean on people for their help and support.

Unique Ways to Honor Your Stillborn at Their Funeral or Memorial

Choosing to have a funereal or memorial is a personal choice, but there are some special ways to honor your baby at either one, including:

• Name your baby at the funeral or memorial. You can do this even if you don’t know the gender by choosing a gender-neutral name or nickname. Giving your baby a name could help you find closure by acknowledging the loss of a person rather than an idea.
• Make a scrapbook of photographs of your pregnancy, the ultrasound, or anything that reminds you of your baby, and ask everyone to write a message in it.
• Organize something special on your baby’s birthday and ask friends and family to join you in a ceremonial activity like lighting candles.
• Keep a memory box of any special items that represent your baby. Include clay or ink hand and footprints, any baby clothes, hospital bracelets, or photographs. You can also ask others to write letters to keep inside the memory box.
• If you haven’t had your baby shower yet, ask people to bring their gifts to the funeral or memorial for you to open in celebration of your baby. You can then donate the gifts to a charity.

Conclusion

Sometimes the weight of the day can be very overwhelming, so it’s perfectly okay if it’s too much to do anything listed above. Whatever way you decide to honor your little one will be perfect, and they will know they are loved beyond measure.